There was a sense of something new and breathtaking when I first saw those movies in theater, something epic and kind of wondrous, and here. Maybe my disappointment with these movies stems from the fact that I’m comparing them too heavily to the original LOTR trilogy. Also Legolas - and I liked Legolas in the LOTR movies, dammit. I have no emotional investment in these people, in whether Thorin becomes King Under the Mountain again, whether Smaug eats everybody, whatever. She’s fine as the slightly feistier version of Arwen, I think.) And, of course, I continue to enjoy Martin Freeman and Ian McKellan because they’re great actors - but that’s it. (I was kind of bored by Tauriel’s whole character arc, though, which is less of an arc and more of a mission to save the one really cute dwarf because he’s cute - but that’s hardly something that can be blamed on the actress. They aren’t all bad - like, Benedict Cumberbatch? Benedict Cumberbatch is totally enjoyable as Smaug,Īnd I actually didn’t hate Evangeline Lilly’s character, Tauriel, despite how much I hated Kate on Lost. I just can’t seem to get into these movies. Also, Stephen Fry! I am always happy to see Stephen Fry around.Īnd I guess I found Radagast less annoying this time around. On a more positive note, I had forgotten about the Stephen Colbert cameo, so I was delighted by that. Thorin is basically Aragorn Jr, but with virtually none of the charm, which doesn’t exactly endear me to the guy.Ĥ. It’s that he continues to be a more surly and unlikable version of another heir to the throne who could potentially succumb to the mistakes of his short-sighted ancestors. It’s not just because he’s annoying - although he is. Thorin obviously has the most characterization, which is unfortunate, since I actively dislike him. I have basically told you everything I know about them.ģ. And you know, they aren’t just any assholes - they are the main characters on the quest. And those I CAN describe. Without cheating by going over my last review (where I know I complained about this), I can now say that the Dwarf Party includes Gloomy Pants Thorin, Cute Boy Kili, Kili’s Loyal Brother (who I think is named Fili and is actually rather attractive himself without his dwarf hair), Gimli’s Pa, a Goofy Looking Dwarf, an Old Mentor Dwarf, and an Overweight Dwarf who Happily Uses Himself in a Barrel as a Bowling Ball for Orcs.ģ69 minutes, and I can’t describe, much less name, all thirteen of these assholes. Also, the characterization is shit because I have now spent two movies, or over 360 minutes, with these dwarves, and I still barely know anything about them. Unfortunately, it also feels almost as directionless as its predecessor, and there’s virtually no tension in it of any kind.Ģ. The Desolation of Smaug isn’t a terrible movie, and I think it’s faster-paced than its predecessor. This is definitely going to be a Baby Review because, honestly, I don’t have a whole lot to say about it. Bilbo, meanwhile, starts playing around with his nice, new, gold ring.ġ. The dwarves continue their quest to get to the Lonely Mountain, defeat the evil dragon Smaug, and reclaim their homeland. I just can’t seem to get into this new trilogy at all. I liked it better than An Unexpected Journey, but. So, the other day, I finally watched The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug.
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